PFC Chapter 83 Who?! Who's cooking shit in the backyard?!
Chapter 83 Who?! Who's cooking shit in the backyard?!
Chapter 83 Who?! Who's cooking shit in the backyard?!
Little Sizi clutched the cloth bag containing spicy strips tightly in her arms and rushed into the courtyard with her short legs.
Because she was running too fast, the threshold tripped her, and her small body lurched forward, almost falling flat on her face.
She ignored the pain and was about to call out "Guoguo" when the scene before her eyes silenced her.
Under the large locust tree in the corner of the courtyard, Su Mu was squatting on the ground with his back to her.
Beside him sat a wooden bucket covered in a mixture of red and white slime. A hole had been dug in the ground, and he was emptying a bloody...
The still-wriggling things were filling the pit.
A strong fishy smell filled the air, mixed with the dampness of turned-up soil.
"Kill—kill silver!"
Little Sizi's eyes widened, and the image of his father shouting "Kill that country bumpkin!" in the Lizheng Hall flashed through his mind.
When the two images overlapped, the little girl burst into tears.
"Don't kill me, buddy! I'm scared!"
Su Mu was about to bury the pile of fish intestines and gallbladders in his hand to make fertilizer when he heard this noise. His hand trembled, and the shovel almost hit his foot.
He turned around and saw the adorable little girl standing at the door, crying so hard she could barely breathe, snot bubbles coming out of her nose.
"What are you yelling about?"
Su Mu stuck the shovel into the soil and casually washed his hands in the bucket next to him. "These are fish entrails. Bury them to fertilize the trees."
Little Sizi stopped sobbing, her big, tear-filled eyes peering into the pit.
It was indeed some red and white stuff, somewhat similar to what she had seen inside the koi carp in the pond in the Imperial Garden.
"Not a murderer?"
The little girl sniffed, her voice still trembling with tears.
"Murder is a crime."
Su Mu shook the water droplets off his hands, walked over, and squatted down, his gaze level with Xiao Sizi's. "What are you doing here? Weren't you delivering spicy strips to Old Li?"
Mentioning this makes the little boy's mouth twitch, and he's about to cry again.
"Father is fierce! Father is going to kill that old farmer! Father even smashed a cup! It scared me to death!"
The little girl hugged the cloth bag in her arms even tighter, "I don't want to stay there, I want to find my husband."
Su Mu raised an eyebrow.
An old man farming? It's probably because that stubborn old man Wei Zheng angered Li Shimin again.
He reached out and ruffled the little girl's soft head, making her neat hair all messy.
"Alright, stop howling. I have a big dish to cook these next few days, and it's not quiet here."
Su Mu stood up and pointed to the wooden barrel in the corner, weighed down by a large blue stone. "See that?"
Little Sizi followed his finger and looked over. It was an ordinary large wooden barrel, covered with planks and weighed down with stones, and the gaps were sealed with yellow mud.
"What is that?"
"nice one."
Su Mu smiled mysteriously, "I'll take you to eat something special in a few days. But don't come these next few days, the fermentation process is quite smelly, I'm afraid it will bother you."
Upon hearing that there was something delicious to eat, the little ox's fear dissipated considerably.
She curiously leaned over and sniffed it, but there was no smell at all.
"Is it even better than flying blindness?"
"That fragrance is different."
Su Mu pushed her towards the door, "Go back quickly, your older sister is probably looking for you all over the world. Remember, come back in seven days."
Little Sizi kept turning back to look at Su Mu, but in the end, Su Mu ruthlessly shut him out of the door.
This wait lasted for seven days.
Over these seven days, the heatwave in Chang'an City grew more intense each day.
Although the locust plague in Henan Province was contained by the army of ducks, this awful weather is just like God's will—
He's deliberately trying to spite someone, without making a sound.
The imperial kitchen was as hot as a steamer.
The cooks, shirtless with towels around their necks, wielded their knives with incredible speed, sweat streaming down their backs.
Liu Fengyu was standing in front of the chopping board, directing his men to cut the venison.
These past few days, His Majesty has been in a bad mood and easily loses his temper. We have to be extra careful with his meals, because if he doesn't like something even a little bit, we'll lose our heads.
"Hurry up, everyone! This venison needs to be sliced as thin as cicada wings, and it'll be cooked in no time after a quick dip in boiling water. If it gets too old, His Majesty will scold us again!"
The voice just fell.
An extremely strange smell crept into the kitchen without warning.
At first, there was only a faint stench, like someone had left rotten eggs in the corner.
Within two breaths, the taste suddenly changed.
Intense, rich, and extremely domineering!
It tastes like a dead rat that's been left to dry in the sun for three days, mixed with moldy rotten beans, and finally topped with a spoonful of swill!
This taste is unreasonable; it rushes straight to the top of your head from your nostrils, explodes in your brain, and makes your stomach churn.
"vomit--!"
A young cook, who was cutting meat, almost cut his finger because his hand trembled.
He covered his mouth, his face turned deathly pale, and he gagged.
"What's that smell?!"
The spoon in Liu Fengyu's hand clattered to the ground.
He pinched his nose, tears welling up in his eyes from the stench. "Who? Who knocked over the slop bucket? Or which bastard is cooking shit?!"
The entire imperial kitchen instantly descended into chaos.
The cooks stopped chopping vegetables, dropping everything they were doing and running outside, covering their mouths and noses. The smell was too strong; it was unbearable.
"Manager! Something's wrong! Is the drain clogged?"
"Bullshit! A clogged sewer wouldn't smell like this! This is clearly a dead body! Did some eunuch die and rot in a pile of firewood?"
Wang Dequan had just returned from serving at the Liangyi Hall and was about to go to the Imperial Kitchen to serve the meal when he was knocked over by the stench as soon as he reached the door.
His old face instantly wrinkled into a chrysanthemum shape, and he didn't even want the whisk in his hand anymore, instead covering his nose with it.
"Oh my goodness! What kind of mess have we made?!"
Wang Dequan shouted in a shrill voice, "Investigate quickly! Investigate for me! His Majesty is about to order a meal. If His Majesty smells this, none of you will live!"
A group of eunuchs covered their noses and began a thorough search despite the stench.
Finally, everyone's eyes were fixed on the broken wooden door leading to the woodshed in the backyard.
That stench that drove people to despair was coming from there.
In the backyard.
Su Mu was wearing his ever-present greasy apron, holding a chopstick in his hand, standing in front of the large wooden tub.
The large bluestone on top has been moved, and the yellow mud used to seal the opening has been broken.
The moment the wooden lid was lifted, the essence that had accumulated for seven days finally saw the light of day again!
The brine in the bucket had an eerie, murky color, and several mandarin fish lay quietly inside.
The gills had turned dark red, the body was slightly greenish, and it had a sticky sheen.
fly!
Countless flies appeared out of nowhere, buzzing around the wooden barrel, and you couldn't shoo them away.
"Perfect!"
Su Mu took a deep breath, and the stench that would make most people turn pale was quite pleasant to him.
This is the taste of protein decomposition and recombination; it's the second life that time gives to ingredients.
"The heat control, the fermentation process—it's absolutely perfect!"
He dipped his chopsticks into the braising liquid and picked up a fish.
The fish is limp but not falling apart, which indicates that the flesh is firm.
Just then, a small head peeked in through the courtyard gate.
Little Sizi specially changed into a new outfit today, a light yellow dress, and her hair was tied in two pretty little buns.
She remembered Su Mu's words, counted the days on her fingers, and came running over early in the morning.
"Brother! I'm so happy!"
Before she could finish speaking, the little girl's expression froze on her face.
Immediately afterwards, her facial features shifted rapidly, and her entire face scrunched up like a bun.
She pinched her nose tightly with both small hands, and her voice became muffled, as if she had a large duck egg in her mouth.
"Ugh—! It stinks! It stinks so bad!"
Little Sizi stumbled back three steps until his back hit the door frame before he stopped.
She stared in horror at Su Mu in the center of the courtyard, and at the large barrel emitting green smoke.
"Hey buddy—are you zipping up your pants pockets or not?"
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