PFC Chapter 179 You know, I left my mother when I was young
Chapter 179 You know, I left my mother when I was young
"Bai Yuan...?"
Qin Lingzheng raised a half-smile, which suddenly froze on his face.
His pupils shrank.
Looking at Bai Yuan in surprise.
The originally bright and determined eyes now became a little confused.
He stared at Bai Yuan quietly, as if trying to find a hint of joking on her face.
But her expression did not change, she just looked at herself calmly.
So calm that it seemed as if it wasn't her who said that.
It even made Qin Lingzheng feel that he was hallucinating.
After a long while, Qin Lingzheng slowly came back to his senses.
He took a deep breath, trying to calm his heart. His lips moved, and he said in a low and hoarse voice:
"What did you say?"
But the reality was not as he wished.
Bai Yuan's calm voice was like a nightmare, forcing him to face reality again.
"You should go to military school. It will be good for both of us to separate for a while."
"why?"
Qin Lingzheng asked persistently.
The two of them were sitting together and chatting just now.
We were traveling together in Haikou before.
Obviously, Bai Yuan has been helping him improve his grades over the past six months, and the two of them are studying hard together to get into Hailan Private High School.
How come in the blink of an eye,...
He clenched his teeth to prevent the bitterness in his throat from choking out.
Why are you sending him away?
This is the first time.
Is he really so... unpopular???
Bai Yuan saw that he looked like he was bullied and about to cry again. Compared with the previous times, his attitude was firm and he remained unmoved.
He said out loud everything that he had just been thinking about.
"You have this thought because you have been too close to me in recent years."
They have been going to and from school together since they were young.
We had dinner at the Bai family every morning and evening.
Plus the time at school.
They spend almost half of the day together.
Originally this wasn't a big deal.
After so many years, Bai Yuan has become accustomed to carrying a pendant wherever he goes.
But today's situation made her suddenly realize that this seamless intimacy has exceeded the scope of normal friendships.
It even gave Qin Lingzheng an invisible illusion.
It made him feel that the two of them would always be together like they were now, and would always maintain this illusion of a close relationship.
But how is it possible?
People are independent individuals.
No one can't survive without the other.
Come to think of it, she had always felt that there was something a little strange about Qin Lingzheng.
He is too clingy to me, and I wish I could be with him 24 hours a day.
She seemed to have mentioned it once at that time.
Bai Yuan vaguely remembered that Qin Lingzheng's answer at that time seemed to be...
Yes……
"You know, Sister Bai Yuan... I left my mother when I was young..."
Bai Yuan:......
The child looked so pitiful at that time, just like a puppy that had been kicked.
Weak, pitiful, and helpless.
It's kind of funny now that I think about it.
Bai Yuan remembered that his answer at that time was——
"You can go back to your mother, too."
Then Qin Lingzheng shut his mouth and didn't say anything else.
This brief topic quickly passed and was forgotten.
Now that I think about it, Qin Lingzheng's behavior actually goes against the laws of human survival and development.
Bai Yuan thought.
It is an instinct engraved in the genes of young animals that they will look for their mothers.
The young of species that are cared for by their parents all have a preference for following their parents.
Even if she has left the breastfeeding period, she shouldn't be so averse to living with her mother like he is.
But Qin Lingzheng abandoned this instinct at some point and instead grafted this following behavior onto himself.
To be honest, it feels weird.
She still felt that Qin Lingzheng had a serious illness.
You should see a psychiatrist.
She even felt that Qin Lingzheng might have separation anxiety.
"Separation anxiety disorder" often occurs in cat and dog puppies, as well as adult dogs.
The main symptoms are:
If you can't see anyone, you will cry.
When it sees people, it wags its tail, comes up to them and rolls around on the ground, acting coquettishly
Going out is like parting with life and death.
When I went out to take out the trash, it was like I hadn't seen you for half a month, and I was so enthusiastic that my tail was about to fly away.
Bai Yuan:......
This confirms the diagnosis.
At this moment, the look she gave Qin Lingzheng became subtle.
"Let's separate for a few years and calm down. Then you will find that everything is just your illusion. You can live a good life without me, and it will be no different from now."
The best way to treat separation anxiety is to separate the dog for a period of time, let it get used to living alone, and forcibly reduce its dependence on humans.
During this time, find something for it to do to distract its attention.
After a period of time, the dog will no longer feel psychological anxiety due to separation from its owner.
But dogs certainly don’t think so.
During this period of separation, the dog will only feel that the owner doesn't want him anymore.
When Qin Lingzheng heard her say that, his heart sank.
He forced the voice of grievance out from his trembling throat.
"What illusion? Do you doubt my sincerity towards you?"
"Bai Yuan, I like you. I really like you."
"I have liked you since I was a child. I have liked you since the first time I saw you. I have liked you for nine years, which is longer than half of my life..."
"How can you doubt my feelings..."
When Qin Lingzheng said this, the tears that had accumulated in his eyes could no longer be controlled and fell down.
“…Is it fake?”
Bai Yuan:......
Bai Yuan: "Don't copy other people's sentences."
How good is his level of writing lyrics and sentences? Don't you know it?
Qin Lingzheng automatically ignored her spoiling words, raised his hand to wipe away his tears, and just looked at her with his wet puppy eyes without saying a word.
Bai Yuan was a little annoyed that he kept emphasizing "sincerely, sincerely, like, like", which seemed neither rational nor mature.
But she didn't get angry with him. Instead, she patiently reasoned with him as she did before.
"You like me, how much? Do you want to marry me?"
Qin Lingzheng didn't expect her to ask so directly and was stunned for a moment.
"OK?"
Bai Yuan's next words were even more straightforward: "Give up, we are not suitable for each other."
This incompatibility does not refer to incompatibility in terms of personality or age.
Rather, it is not suitable for the family interests behind the two people.
"The Bai family and the Qin family are too close, and it would have a bad impact if they split up in the future."
Qin Lingzheng got a little anxious when he heard this, and hurriedly defended himself and expressed his sincerity:
“How can you know if it’s not suitable if you don’t try it?
I have liked you for nine years, and I will continue to like you for nineteen, twenty-nine years, and I will always like you in the future. There is absolutely no way I will change my mind, so how can we break up?"
After hearing what he said, Bai Yuan fell silent again.
The key problem is not with him, but with myself.
She knew clearly that she was not a loyal and long-lasting person.
Although she likes to be conservative.
For example, she has learned the violin for ten years and she practices every day, without slacking off for even a single day except for these few days when she was sick.
But I also like to pursue new things.
Just like when she was learning the violin, she also became curious about the pipa, guzheng, piano, trumpet, flute, harp and other instruments she had never touched before.
If there are sufficient reasons, or if you are more interested in it than the violin you are learning now.
Then there is a great possibility that she will give up the violin and learn other instruments.
This doesn't just apply to learning a musical instrument.
A person's character traits can be seen from the small and reflected in all aspects.
If we are just friends, then there is no problem in getting along for a lifetime.
But if they took their relationship to a more intimate level, she didn't think she could last long.
It's not that difficult if we don't know each other well.
But for families like hers and Qin Lingzheng's, there is already a deep friendship between the families, and the relationship between their parents and ancestors is very good.
She had also received the Qin family's kindness, and the Qin family's aunt, uncle, and grandfather treated her like a family member.
She treated the Qin family's only son like this again.
I always feel that it is not very moral.
I can’t get over the hurdle in my heart called “morality”.
If that's the case, we might as well not be together in the first place.
Give both families some dignity.